Hey y’all, I wanted to catch up with you on what’s going on in my life this week and just chat. I’m currently knee deep in exam week and I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed. But I’m hanging in there because I only have a pre-calc and AP psychology exam left! Trying to study for exams and post five days a week has been difficult, and yesterday was sort of like a breaking point for me. I felt so overwhelmed because I couldn’t post a blogpost like I had planned, and I was angry with myself for not planning better/keeping up with my promise of doing five posts a week up until Christmas. I had an early exam and meetings with teachers throughout the day so the only time I actually had free in my day was from 1:30-4:00. And in that time I had planned to have lunch, study for my physics exam and write a blog post, which unfortunately isn’t realistic. So when It was 4:00pm and I still hadn’t wrote a blogpost, I felt like a failure. I looked at my sister and said, “I’ve done nothing today”. I was disappointed because I couldn’t get one thing off my to do list, despite all my other accomplishments that day. And of course she laughed and reminded me that I had taken a French exam, went to a Physics review session, took the second portion of my French exam, studied for my physics exam, and was about to go meet with a teacher to review for my math exam (whoo that was a lot of exams in one sentence lol). Y’all I was honestly shocked because none of that had registered in my mind. I felt as if I’d been sitting in bed all day watching Greys Anatomy (which is what I wish I could have done). It was just the idea of getting my to-do list completed to be productive that made me feel like I failed. I love productivity, and crave for things to line up perfectly in my day, jam packing my to-do list making it long enough for an entire week. I’m a perfectionist by nature and feel like I’m constantly trying to prove myself…mostly to myself, which of course never ends well. I wanted to share this with y’all for a few reasons, first off I want to always be completely honest and real on my blog. I’m a human, I’m not perfect, and I too have days where I feel like my mind is moving 10 times faster than my body. I want y’all to know that productivity is your effort that you put forward. There will be times where you feel as if you’ve accomplished nothing even though you were productive all day. And the worst thing you can do is compare yourself to other friends and bloggers who seem to do it all, it isn’t fair to yourself. If you put your best foot forward, then give yourself credit and accept that you may not always be able to do as much as you planned. Sometimes we’re able to accomplish more in one day than another, and that’s completely fine! So next time you feel like you’ve done nothing be kind with yourself, remember everything you’ve already accomplished, and go treat yourself to a coffee!
Thanks for listening to me ramble (lol) and I hope this can help you in some way! Are any of y’all to-do list makers? I’d love to hear from you in the comments!